Less - And JT Earle -

 Listening to a Zoom mtg. on Mindfulness the past few days. Some questions I'm being asked to ask: 

When everything is taken away, who are you? What do you have? 

If this is all there is, am I okay with that? 

And the constant reminder to be right here, right now. 

With the death of Justin Townes Earle, I'm asking this question - Is that all there is? 

Present'ism -

Presentism - Interpreting yesterday's events through today's lens - 

As Scott and I were on the tour bus taking us from Glasgow, Scotland to the Isle of Mull, a woman made a rather harsh statement to the tour guide. "The Scottish Vikings were a rough group of people. They raped, pillaged, burned, and ran rampant through Scotland. Horrible people." And the tour guide, in a calm and confident voice replied, "We cannot judge yesterday with today's standard. I cannot be in their minds or the minds of my ancestors. I can only hope that today is different, learn from the past, and move forward."

I wanted to applaud!

I've thought of this conversation over and over again whenever I want to be harsh on yesterday and glorify today, or vice-versa. Particularly when it comes to cancer and the changes it brought - meaning - I am not whom I was.

Before cancer I was . . . , post-cancer I am . . .

Before cancer I had . . . , while after cancer my life has been . . .

Before cancer I wasn't . . . , yet after cancer I have . . .

And we can all fill in these blanks, because I would imagine I'm not the only one who judges the past through rose colored glasses and today through hyper-focused sharp-shooting too clear glasses (and if your cancer-free world was nothing but beauty, I'll buy you a Diet Pepsi).

And yet - today is good! And today is harsh. And today is filled with beauty, even with the scars, the numbness, the thinning (and thickening), the pains, the tingling, the unevenness, and the triggers that show that cancer is never far from our thoughts.

Acknowledge the past and move forward. And remember that when looking at yesterday , we look at it through our today. Who can judge?

Have a great week; take care of yourself, be gentle with yourself.

Took a Drive - Mt. Rushmore -

 Scott and I road-tripped to Mt. Rushmore a few days ago. It was a l-o-n-g drive - and yet absolutely stunning. I loved the big open blue skies with white puffy clouds, and no inversion; the Ponderosa Pines that give the Black Hills their name were a beautiful surprise, and the fields of Nebraska that went on and on and one brought me peace. Mt. Rushmore and Crazy Horse were quite the sight.