Tuesday, June 9, 2015

Lists - and Dreams -

I'm a list maker - on paper, in my mind, in piles sitting on my desk and in my craft room. Grocery, tasks, schedule, syllabus, are just a few of the type of lists I make. I typically use a torn off piece of paper rather than some formal lined and itemized paper. I think that's because I want my list to stay informal and flexible - taking off and putting on as needed. I write my lists in pen, but I keep "white out" nearby, and I often use it when I'm making changes - I don't like seeing what I "was doing/needing" but changed as a crossed out or accomplished item. My lists are typically private, kept on my desk, on my calendar, or in a notebook of things I need to be doing at work. Make sense?

However, there have been some lists I haven't made.

While in Colorado a couple of weeks ago, Scott and I drove from Durango to Silverton to Ouray. What a beautiful drive! Windy high roads, narrow in some places, and spectacular. At one point we were 10,000 ft. above sea level.

As we came down from the last summit, we drove into a beautiful mountain town, Ouray, CO. We were surprised and delighted by this beautiful place. We wandered the main street, chatted with a couple of shop owners, and had a great time hearing about "why I live in Ouray." I tell you, if I had to pick a village to live in, this would be on my "list."

At one darling shop I found a blanket with this saying on it:

Within your heart keep one still, secret spot where dreams may go, and sheltered where doubt and fear are not. Oh, keep a place within your heart, for little dreams to go. (Louise Driscoll)

Words have a way of working on me. I love art - high and folk, but I adore language. And these words hit my heart so hard and fast that I was in tears and sobbing before I knew what had happened to me. 

This is when I realized what has been missing in my life; I have struggled this winter and spring with some depression, feeling something was missing, a piece of me out of place, and here was the missing piece. I was missing one list - a list of dreams, of future, of hope, of wishes. 

So I made a list of things I want to do this summer - because writing down these hopes turns them into dreams, which turns them into reality - if - I - so - choose - but it's the dreaming that I've been missing out on. And I think I'll make a list of those secret dreams, in my heart, because we all have dreams; I used to dream, and I need to start that process - again.

RSandRB Performing Friday Night in Orem as part of Orem's Summerfest
This song is also a "graduation" piece. 

Here's the rest of that poem; Driscoll (1875-1957) was a teacher in New York. She wrote a few poems, but this one seems to have lived on. In its entirety, or portions of it, are often recited at graduations. I think I'll graduate - to dreams! 

Hold fast your dreams!

Within your heart
Keep one still, secret spot
Where dreams may go,
And, sheltered so,
May thrive and grow
Where doubt and fear are not.
O keep a place apart,
Within your heart,
For little dreams to go!

Think still of lovely things that are not true.
Let wish and magic work at will in you.
Be sometimes blind to sorrow. Make believe!
Forget the calm that lies
In disillusioned eyes.
Though we all know that we must die,
Yes you and I
May walk like gods and be
Even now at home in immortality.

We see so many ugly things—
Deceits and wrongs and quarrelings;
We know, alast we know
How quickly fade
The color in the west,
The bloom upon the flower,
The bloom upon the breast
And youth's blind hour.
Yet keep within your heart
A place apart
Where little dreams may go,
May thrive and grow.
Hold fast—hold fast your dreams! 

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