Vulnerability is valuable –
Kurt Vonnegut said,
Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard.
Do not let pain make you hate.
Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness.
Take pride that even though the rest of the world may disagree,
you still believe it to be a beautiful place.
When I am at my weakest, I am my most vulnerable. I am fearing my own fear. Bitterness definitely steals my sweetness. Yet being vulnerable can be so rewarding, and beneficial. This is when friends and family, others can be by my side, supporting me – reaching out for meals, errands, cleaning, seeing me in my pj’s or sweats, no makeup, no hair – being brave and vulnerable enough to cry.
I have learned how to be comfortable with uncertainty. I learned how to have faith. I learned I wasn’t in control, and that was OK. Uncertainty became my middle name, but I knew my support system and my Higher Power had my back.
I had to learn what “need” really meant, and be fine with needing and wanting others.
Vulnerability taught me how to be humble. All games were tossed to the side, all of my facades were broken down, and there I was, in my nakedness, in my authentic self.
Life is precious. Not because it is unchangeable. To love life means to love its vulnerability, asking for care, attention, guidance, and support. Life and death are connected by vulnerability and remind us of the preciousness of our lives. I have had to trust my intuition on this journey, working at my own pace, and asking as many questions as I could. And I’ve found out life has all (well, most of) the answers.
“Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.” CS Lewis
Vulnerability = Intimacy