Tuesday, November 10, 2015

Daughters and Passing the Baton -

On Sunday Scott and I attended church at Jenna's ward. I thoroughly enjoyed sitting on the fourth row and watching/listening to sweet Tempest sing and sign her heart out. She was filled with joy, no inhibitions, and right on tune!

I attribute her lovely voice and her ability to make a joyful noise to her sweet parents who are extraordinarily musical and to Tempest's love of music (many of you have seen her Instagram tunes).
She was pure happiness - and her confidence was pure innocence. She sang because she wanted to sing.

As the program was wrapping up, Jenna walked to the front of the chapel, beckoned to Tempest, and they walked to the pulpit together. And they sang. Oh, my heart was in my throat, and my smile was bigger than the chapel. And I didn't record it.

With this moment came a gigantic realization. All that I have worked for, with, toward, was standing in front of me. All the good and bad, the pains and triumphs, were made manifest. My baby is a mother, and she has a girl, just like her, just like I had, and yet no longer, no more. The roles have changed significantly, and that cute little girl I loved, I taught to stand in front of an audience with a smile, singing loudly and clearly, is now that momma, doing just the same. What I saw was me with Jenna by my side, along with Jenna standing over me, with Tempest by her side, almost as if it was a shadow superimposed over a clear image. Am I making sense?

I saw the love Jenna had, as she gently sang her song, prompting Tempest along with a guiding hand, a comforting smile, confidence and gentleness. And the payback/payforward was made.

I am the grandma, the proud grandma now. Yet I'm also the proud mother - Miss Jenna is doing a mighty fine job with her little ones. I could not be more 'puffed up in righteousness." And now - my role of rearing children is finished. I can be there for my kids, support them, love them, but I have taught them what I've taught - no go-backs, no rewinds, no do-overs. It's done, finished, over. However, I can smile, I can guide, because just like Jenna is doing an awesome job with hers, and Tyler is a splendid father, I know I gave them my best; I can continue to do so. And my heart is full. The baton gets passed, and I'm pretty ok about letting it go -

Is that hairdo cute? And oh her outfit was darling, totally Jenna. I mean, Tempest!
And isn't that Knudsen chin so stinkin' cute?!  

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