Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Graduation -

Today is graduation day! I am released from my doctor's care and supervision. Hurray. I see my oncologists now every 3 months.

It's been a crazy month as I've counted down to this day. So many worries, so many changes, so many self-induced scares. The anxiety has about driven me nuts (or in other words, I have driven me nuts). I am looking forward to playing in the dirt without gloves and sharing my ice cream with my grandchildren, and perhaps registering for a 5k.

On another note - it is the end of the school year. I get a little melancholic this time of year, thinking about school being out - remembering how much I loved having my children home for the summer. I think about their high school graduations - remembering how they embraced the new. I think of my students, those who walked out of UVU with a diploma in their hands, hesitant and confident. I missed them this year.

I also think about my high school graduation, 30+ years ago. It wasn't until about 10 years ago that I was able to listen to music from my era and embrace that music and the memories associated with it. I had to make peace with a lot of my past, and in making peace, the good memories surfaced.

The Class of 1977 graduation song was Seals and Crofts, "We May Never Pass This Way Again." I was the chairperson for our class reunion last year, and we chose this for our reunion theme. It's been on my mind on and off since mid-August, last year.

I've sung it, quietly, as I've moved through this past 9 months. I have wanted to embrace the bad and the good; I never want to pass this way again, but I want the day-to-day moments and my memories of them to be ones of calm, peace, joy, contentment. I want to sail my ship out on the open sea, cast away my fears, and laugh while the laughin' is easy.


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