Sunday, March 20, 2016

Day 19, 20 - And When Breath Becomes Air -

Day 19

Gratitude - 
Planted seeds today! Breath - my chest has been so tight and congested, and I am grateful my lungs have not been so. I can breathe, without pain. Snot - not really, but boy oh boy, I'm blowing and coughing snot like crazy! 

Journal - 
In my next life I'll be married to Scott, we'll have a two-story farmhouse with high ceilings, a picture holding 12" down from which to hang lovely pieces of art, a huge tub overlooking our 5 acres. And Scott will have land to farm, crops to grow, animals to care for, and dirt to turn. He will be happy in this garden of Eden. Why? Scott should have been a gentleman farmer - he is his happiest when he's outside working in our yard. And watching him work on our little slice of heaven is heavenly. I love this man. 

Exercise - 
Still - coughing and blowing. Although we did walk around the mall! 

Meditate - 
Today while planting the garden I spent time thanking my Higher Power for good soil, for the ability to grow our own vegetables, for a tiny plot of land that creates beauty and abundance, and all we have to do is nurture the gift we have. Joy in being present in the yard, tilling and planting, in preparation of sowing. 


Random Act - 
Watching a movie Scott wants to watch tonight - and not whining. That's an act of kindness! 


Day 20 - 

Gratitude - 
Why does my heart with gladness sing? Only because it's spring!!!

Journal - 
I've finished reading the short book, When Breath Becomes Air, by Paul Kalinithi. A must read for anyone thinking about life's journey and the unexpected routes it can take us, just when we think we're in control. Again and again he reaffirms my cancer journey, and he jolts me into awareness as I care for my clients. So many poignant passages - including, "Had I been more religious in my youth, I might have become a pastor, for it was the pastoral role I'd sought." (88) Quoting Samuel Beckett, "I can't go on. I'll go on." (149) It's good, short, thought-provoking, and poignant. Read - 

Exercise - 
Walked around the block this afternoon. That's a big deal after being down for a week. 

Meditate - 
Sat on the willow chair on the front porch, people watched, soaked in some sun, and thought - particularly about spring!

Random Act - 
I typically prep and cook the week's meals on Sunday. Today was no difference. Why Random Act? Well, I also cook at least 2 meals for my folks while fixing our meals. And lately our guest, Trent, has been eating with us as well. Neither are part of the "contract," but just what we do. 


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